Someone said, many can be fathers but only few can be dads. Still in the mood of celebrating fathers I would like to celebrate a particular group of fathers – the hands on daddies. To be specific those daddies that accepted their wives and girlfriends with kids from previous relationships.
Not so many men do that, in most of the cases that I have heard of, the woman is always forced to give away the child, either to her parents, sisters or brothers or to some un-known caretakers. Other fathers on the other hand accepted the children these women came with but all their lives made them feel unwanted and out castes.
I know at least one or two people who have adopted children their wives’ came with and have raised them as their own. A close friend of mine shared her story with me. Currently married for the last two years, she and her husband had been friends for a long time but had never considered ever dating let alone marrying this mister.
He was a traveler and worked abroad, but she ignored him every time he made passes at her. Her then boyfriend got her pregnant but decided to stay with someone else while she was left with the child in her belly to face the world alone. Some not so good advisors told her that getting rid of the child would be the best thing to do but she knew shed never forgive her-self if she ever did that.
She decided to keep the child and as she went on with her daily activities her path crossed again with the man she only considered a friend. He himself coming from a single family, raised solely by his mother, this guy decided to make her his wife and take claim of the child.
From day one, she says, he has been responsible for their daughter’s upkeep. Their child calls him dad and he calls her daughter. Her story is just beautiful, how I wish all men were like him. The last time we talked she said there is no-one she would like to raise her child but him, and I understand why.
Like I said before, there so many men out there who call themselves fathers, but only a few qualify to be dads. For those very few men raising not theirs but doing a good job – congratulations. It takes a real man to do what you are doing. At least all of us can say we know one or two guys playing daddy to some one else’s child.
Happy fathers day to all the men that have played a big role in a child’s life. The society needs more of their kind. And may all the boys raised by them become better men!!!